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how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

Boundaries are necessary for all relationships, but they’re especially vital when dealing with negative, critical, or toxic people. Setting boundaries isn’t always how to deal with someone who avoids conflict as simple as saying no or walking away. In a lot of situations, boundaries are signals that let the other person know how to communicate effectively with you.

  • For example, you can’t always walk away from conflict or a negative interaction at work or with someone in your family.
  • Respectfully, directly, and openly discussing opposing perspectives and resolving conflicts collaboratively can create a sense of unity, shared purpose, and mutual respect within the relationship.
  • The content of this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, examination, diagnosis, or treatment.
  • What worked for one person when they were 21 may not necessarily work for someone who is 21 today.
  • A lot of the research shows that conflict avoiders often come from homes where conflict was a bad thing.
  • Start improving your confidence, your conversation skills, or your ability to bond – in less than an hour.

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how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

Set Yourself Up for Success

Humor can help you say things that might otherwise be difficult to express without offending someone. However, it’s important that you laugh with the other person, not at them. When humor and play are used to reduce tension and anger, reframe problems, and put the situation into perspective, the conflict can actually become an opportunity for greater connection and intimacy. Assertive communication is an essential skill for conflict resolution, as it enables you to express your needs in a respectful manner while also collaboratively resolving your disagreement with your partner.

How can you recognize if you or your partner are dealing with conflict avoidance?

how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

A 2018 study revealed that direct confrontation for severe problems is most beneficial for couples in relationships where both partners are able to change. For example, one person in the relationship may become jealous when another starts spending a lot of their time going out with co-workers instead of coming home after work. In a committed romantic relationship, there are often challenges and conflicts you and your partner will face. The challenges occur because a relationship consists of two individuals, each with their own goals, motives, and desires that don’t always align with one another. Leaving conflicts unresolved leads to pent-up frustration and a greater sense of loneliness that can build up over time. Disagreeing with someone doesn’t necessarily mean “fighting.” Keep in mind that it’s not about blaming the other person or proving who’s right and wrong in a given situation.

how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

Health Categories to Explore

  • Being close to someone addicted to alcohol can bring an immense amount of stress into your life.
  • This happens because when two people are not communicating, they are not connecting on a physical level either.
  • While it’s OK to never be completely comfortable with confrontation, being able to resolve issues effectively means accepting it as a healthy part of communicating with others.
  • Listen without interruption to what the other person has to say.
  • Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries with others is a skill you can learn and practice.

how to deal with someone who avoids conflict

Core skill 2: Emotional awareness

  • Conflict is a normal part of relationships, but there are ways to avoid it.
  • Moshe Ratson, MBA, MFT, is a psychotherapist and executive coach in NYC.
  • Instead of trying to sedate emotions like anger, sadness, or fear, try looking at them through the lens of self-compassion, and allowing yourself to see your negative thoughts with empathy.
  • Conflict avoidance is a prevalent issue in relationships.

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